Great comment Antoine

The household I live in and the friends I once had are totally different than me. They are projectors and I’m self-aware. They see the world as happening to them and I see the world as a place I create. Everyone’s a victim but I’m surviving those disillusioned by the lies they tell themselves.

I can’t even care fully for these people anymore because they don’t care about their own selves correctly. I no longer accept the blame these people shoveled my way nor do I defend myself against their non-sense. They want to play victim then that’s fine I’ll play the villain without exception. Being less than is how they choose to feel so who am I to try to plead with their personal self beliefs whether adult or child.

Rational conversation to the irrational mind is fruitless. As I proceed though this spiritual, psychical, psychological, and technical change I can see how stuck those around me are. They are only living by definition but in a whole sense they are completely dead.

They need me so much to justify their existence and I see/feel their everyday struggles in order to keep tabs on me but through their desperation it’s impossible for them to see the inevitable truth. I have moved on plain and simple. I make no excuses. And yes I admit this process is confusing, boring, a little stressful, and/or frustrating at times but my faith outweighs these factors.

I’m on my way to socializing and living with others that have self-respect. I will only be a story to tell to those who seek attention. This had to happen for me to be more than mediocre in life. This has to happen for me to be great.